D-MER?
What is D-MER? This is a condition that every family should be aware of, not because it is going to happen to you. It is actually not that common. But when it does happen to a breastfeeding family, the parent can feel like they are going crazy. Please listen to this podcast to help other families!
D-MER stands for Dysphoric Milk Ejection Reflex. Let us explain. When a mother starts to breastfeed (or pump or hand express), she may feel a wave of emotion that is not pleasant. These feelings can come either right before or during her oxytocin surge, the letdown. Most parents feel a sense of peace, calm, or relaxation during an oxytocin surge. However, with D-MER, they may feel despondency, anxiety, and/or aggression. For despondency, these feelings can range from a surge of mild sadness to extreme depression. For anxiety, a feeling of restlessness might come up, or maybe panic or dread. Anger is the least likely of the three emotions, and it can present in a range from irritation to rage.
What to do about D-MER?
We are working on finding possible solutions for this condition, but letting families know that what they are feeling is real can provide relief and validation! Knowing that this is a temporary condition is also helpful. These feelings usually last for a few seconds to a minute or two. This condition also tends to resolve after a few months as hormones settle. Only very rarely does this continue beyond 3-4 months. Again, once mothers know what is going on, they can often ride out the waves and continue to breastfeed successfully.
If you or a family member you know is experiencing such sadness, anxiety, or aggression that it seems at all out of control, please get in touch with your health care provider right away. They may need to be educated about D-MER, so be prepared to share this resource, a wonderful site created for women who suffer from this condition.
If you work with breast/chestfeeding families and are passionate about lactation support, or you want to turn your passion for nursing into professional practice, check out LactaLearning.com and consider following us on social media!
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